God's Whiniest Soldier!

Good afternoon.
Summer break has been so unbelievably boring so far.
I thought I would enjoy doing the same things I have been for my entire life — drawing, playing video games, watching funny people play video games, surfing the web, reading, and the whole shebang in the company of my lonesome — but I'm honestly surprised to find myself dissatisfied and restless. I believed I'd be relieved to be out of the massive city my university's in and out of my shitty little dorm room, but I think university had made me used to being around so many people all of the time; whether they be instructors, acquaintances, coworkers, strangers, friends, or ex-fuckbuddies. I knew I was cooked when I was searching for community events to attend, goddamn. I'll try to participate in Art Fight this year (here's my profile! But the site's down at the time of writing!), despite the sheer number of full-body references I've gotta churn out. This is probably gonna be the most exciting thing about my summer, despite how drained I'll be…
I guess I'm also used to going on outings whenever I want. I mean, I can still do that now, but I've lived in my hometown for my entire life and kind of already know everything here. Plus, everything here is so far apart compared to the city I was in for university, but maybe I'm just pissy because I live in a pretty unremarkable area.

Speaking of my hometown, I'm — unfortunately — attending college here this year. Not university because the local university costs an arm and a leg, but I'm probably gonna try getting an associates or something before transferring back to the other place. Very confusing, yes… but most of the classes I took in the prior academic year were core classes I wanted to get out of the way. Plus, maybe taking shortcuts for engineering of all things isn't the best idea.
The main problem I have is who's attending. What if I see people from high school? Am I gonna have to air out the whole block to keep the past from haunting me further? I doubt it since I'm pretty sure no one shares the same major as me, and I shouldn't have any more core classes to finish… plus I don't think I'm gonna have to take another computer science class anytime soon… But the fear paralyzes me nonetheless. You'd be scared out of your mind, too, if your high school was a complete shithole filled to the brim with people who'd be better off dead!

Sorry about that tangent. Anyway, have you had a strange sense of apathy with the internet lately?
Like, I dipped from any and all mainstream platforms aside from YouTube and Discord (because my friends have it) last year and never looked back, but I've felt myself feeling like I shouldn't be using either of the two stragglers either. I only have Discord because some friends of mine have it and I only use YouTube to watch Vinesauce VODs or listen to music as background noise. That's it. So, I don't know what my problem is. Maybe it stems from me busting my ass for classes? Maybe I should be taking antidepressants or something?? Those make you more motivated, right?
Being on social media in general has felt increasingly pointless as of late. Maybe that's just because of university getting me used to being around people, maybe it's just because I outgrew those spaces, maybe it's because I have better things to do with my life beyond art community drama. I'll have to think on this…